It is the first/second/third day of December. I don’t really know. Our neighbour made us Christmas Cake today. Ethel is nice.
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
im putting vaseline on my penis Boner says:
im going ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
ive just spread it over my shaft
im working the stiff gel, warming it
it grows more viscous Boner says:
why are you doing this? ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
a subtle contradiction to the hardening flesh of my penis Boner says:
stiff gel? ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
the vaseline melts under my warm palm Boner says:
wait ill show this to my parents ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
my hand becomes a butter knife as i spread it over the length of my raging erection Boner says:
i hate you ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
my hand glides up and down, like a seagull bobbing int he ocean breeze
carefree…..
i close my eyes, almost taken to a point of nirvana
and in an instant, my metaphorical adventure is complete, with the waves foamy wash sprayed out before me Boner says:
guess you have a low sperm count
probably from the tight jeans
probably a good thing
did i say i hate you yet? ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
ps that was a story about masturbation
and using vaseline as lube
i call it
“The Time I Used Vaseline As Lube” Boner says:
o
i would never have guessed ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
i rulz
My life is boring. Played COD6 today. Pretty over it already.
This is what comes up when you type in “Jim Russell” in google images.
It is just outside somewhere. Vincenzo’s Restaurant I think. I went there when I was young. I don’t remember enjoying it. I enjoyed this though. I didn’t want to stand with the other losers.
There used to be a town our family stopped at on our trips to Yamba from Wallangarra when I was a kid called Mummulgum. It was the only ice cream shop, and it ruled eating ice cream when you were in a car with no air con in the volcanic summer. This hill is just on the way in, and the guys skated it. They almost got mowed down by a truck. Losers.
We had to take a major detour through Lennox Head to drop off Koby’s car at his grandparent’s house. We decided to take a picture of us at this moment. We came back unshaven and derelict. Softy is probably medically retarded now.
Well, officially so.
At Ballandean, just outside Wallangarra, there was a triceratop statue for some reason. Right next to it was some random sign that said “Yo Moe”. Fitting, considering I’m badly doing Moevember.
www.benmaslenphotography.blogspot.com
I have a video I’ll upload tomorrow. It involves funny things. You laugh.
We left at about 8.30 in the morning. Had to take a detour through Lennox beca Koby wanted to leave his car there at his Pop’s house. Got a lot of pictures near Sextonville, Great Dividing Range, skating down Mummulgum Hill and riding a stegosaurus. I have no food, so I’ve nearly lost a lot of money just snacking. I just realised I left my lolly snakes in the McDonald’s we are eating at. Bet those cunts are eating them. Yeah I’ve just moved in there and they have. We were severely disappointed with the Boonooboonoo Falls, which were non-existant. Richard did a sick hand brakey. Best scenery driving through.
Lappy is almost out of battery, will upload pics when we find a powerpoint. CYL8R. Matt’s car is broken. Softy is yet to scull 5 boots of beer.
I have done nothing these past two weeks. My life is just repetition and a constant feeling of being tired.
Couldn’t get into a movie I didn’t really want to see last night.
Schoolies road trip starts on Sunday.
Watched Skins. I do a lot of things I said I’d never do nowadays. Skins is just small scale.
Everyone is dumb.
I say this because I have just cut 73 contacts worth of drivel from my MSN contacts list. All their pm’s were fucking stupid, as were they. The internet should not be wasted on them.
I need their download speed. I found out mine is about 1.62 m/s, which is barely anything compared to most people. Telstra sucks.
Third world countries have better internet.
FUCK AUSTRALIA.
Also saw a guy that had a FUCK OFF WE’RE FULL shirt on.
Nice southern cross tatt too m8.
Little kid on Home and Away is a jerk. You’re fucking 8, you don’t have attitude.
I earned 160 dollars working at Matt’s house for his dad, building and such. Broke a drill bit, but otherwise it was good getting out of the house.
Dug a shitload of trench.
Here is a conversation I had with Connor.
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
hey guess who i had sex with
Boner says:
your sister
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
nah
Boner says:
ahah
this is a joke right?
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
haha no
it happened at codies
Boner says:
no
no
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
yes yes
Boner says:
tell me all
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
ben drew stepping out
k
i got mega drunk
off a lot of beers
and i made a phone
call
and she was at the party
so i was like “hey how are you?”
to which genevieve webster replied
Boner says:
AHAHah
i fucking despise you
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
“ready to straddle your massive cock baby”
my semi angry penis grew harder
madder
it wanted vengeance
a price paid in pussy blood
Boner says:
STOP BEING SO FUCKING GRAPHIC
hahahahaha
we arent friends
ben drew, ruiner of everything. says:
my knob tore and bit at her labia
burrowing its way in, like a badger down into its hutch
the thrusts were seismic in magnitude
for a second god and the devil were one
and the earth was beautiful
then i came in her hair and kicked her in the stomach
dumb bitch
Boner says:
hahahahaha
no seriously
dont come here tonight
you arent welcome
Went to a Halloween party last night. Happy Birthday Codie /Elly again.
I can see why Halloween isn’t celebrated in this country, there just wasn’t enough heart in it.
I’ve seen little Tennessee kids pour their hearts into their costumes, and all we can garner over here is a little paint on your face.
Oh well. Got no lollies as well, so fuck everything.
Walked home in the semi rain with Kneller. Rage was on at 2 in the morning and we watched Lamb of God videos til I fell asleep. Good part of night.
Everyone on MSN sucks. No offence, but christ. No wonder none of you have friends.
Except Rayne and Sean, who have both started conversations. Holy shit.
Hung in town with Kneller, NialDOG and Rayne. Seriously, why don’t people hang downtown? Everyone carries on about how Yamba rules, but about 4 people I know walk the street per day. I hate going outside and I even make the effort.
Kids these days, I swear.
Also: Golden Gaytimes. I haven’t eaten one in a while. Fuck homophobia, I’m buying one next time I have three dollars.
I’ve been listening to Wish for Wings for the last couple of days. Moshin’ round town. My blood does indeed run for this family.
I have been taking the online RTA Driver Knowledge Test on and off, because I really need my L’s.
\
Actually passed it today. Usually I don’t pay attention when I do it, I guess exam period has got me all alert and shit.
Winner. Who the fuck needs to know about traffic lanes anyway, I’m not in America.
Halloween show/party this week. My money is extremely low. I have to give Maslen money for breaking his window. Fuck my clumsy life. I’m going as a box robot. Cheap and awesome.
She had a lil shindig. I just….*sigh*
Alcohol is no one’s friend in the end. Just ask Maslen’s smashed car window/money vase.
It was Disney themed, I went as Woody, then changed it to the cowboy from Indian in the Cupboard, then people realised I was Woody so I changed it back.
Bang bang Bart.
www.benmaslenphotography.blogspot.com
He didn’t take the above photos, except the first one. And yeah.
He takes many a photo.
I don’t know if that’s new or old. Silly Maslen.
This is for all you fools who think you can mess with Matt McDonald.
Fools better fucking recognise.
Waiting for the rain to stop so I can buy Doritos for nachos.
Fuck Mother Nature, biggest slut.
4/7 HSC exams down.
Maths was pretty easy I guess.
The end is so near I can taste it.
It tastes like this
Spencer added me a bit back. Complimented my blog in it’s early days. He’s the dude that took the Byron Defiant shots. Mad dude, scope his photography
http://www.flickr.com/photos/spencerphotog/
Went to Grafton costume shop/porn store/penis-shaped pacifier store. They didn’t have an Aladdin costume, so Matt and I got Buzz and Woody from Toy Story. Kind of wish I did Aladdin still, but fuck it.
Going to Grafton tomorrow to pick up an Aladdin costume if the town has one. I assume they won’t.
According to Google this is what Aladdin looks like :
Sick one, racists.
2/7 HSC exams done today. Wish I read As You Like It. It was alright though, just made shit up, bullshitting and pretending I’ve read it in the last two years. Planning a ten day roadtrip for Schoolies with Matt, Softy and Maslen. Richard will be in Noosa (LA DE DA) with a shitcunt crew, wishing he was cruising through bumfuck towns and frollicking in paddocks.
This will be his face.
It is just outside somewhere. Vincenzo’s Restaurant I think. I went there when I was young. I don’t remember enjoying it. I enjoyed this though. I didn’t want to stand with the other losers.
There used to be a town our family stopped at on our trips to Yamba from Wallangarra when I was a kid called Mummulgum. It was the only ice cream shop, and it ruled eating ice cream when you were in a car with no air con in the volcanic summer. This hill is just on the way in, and the guys skated it. They almost got mowed down by a truck. Losers.
We had to take a major detour through Lennox Head to drop off Koby’s car at his grandparent’s house. We decided to take a picture of us at this moment. We came back unshaven and derelict. Softy is probably medically retarded now.
At Ballandean, just outside Wallangarra, there was a triceratop statue for some reason. Right next to it was some random sign that said “Yo Moe”. Fitting, considering I’m badly doing Moevember.
\
Bang bang Bart.
Fools better fucking recognise.
Fuck the Internet.
Spencer added me a bit back. Complimented my blog in it’s early days. He’s the dude that took the Byron Defiant shots. Mad dude, scope his photography
